Posts Tagged ‘movie’

In the past I’ve had to sneak up unseen on a highly trained marine sniper who was looking for me, so avoiding some Tinerfeño security guards to take some photos of the Clash of the Titans set on Tenerife wasn’t really in the same league.

The seat of the gods

The seat of the gods

To be honest at the time I wasn’t actually aware I was sneaking up on anything, otherwise I’d have gone the whole hog and ‘cam’d up’ to blend in with the scenery in the Mount Teide crater. I merely parked the car, grabbed my camera and wandered across the volcanic landscape to get a better view of the row of seated gods who looked as though they’d actually been there since the time of Perseus and his cronies.

Admittedly the route I chose did take me away from the scene and into a dip which probably hid me from prying eyes until I emerged on an outcrop overlooking the main set. I was well outside the taped off ‘forbidden zone’ and didn’t think there was a problem until a piercing whistle shattered the silence and a figure in a bright yellow jacket on a rock opposite started waving furiously at me. I waved back and headed back to the road where another security guard was chatting with three Spanish tourists who, after a few seconds, wandered away from the guard and closer to the set. I was baffled. Why were they allowed close to the set and I wasn’t? Okay, I had a chuffin’ big camera around my neck, but hey they had mobile phones and guess what you can do with them?

The scenery is transformed

The scenery is transformed

I decided to check out with the guard what I could and couldn’t do.

“How close can I get to take photos?”
I asked him.
“You can’t take photos,” he replied.
“Not even from here? This is the road…it’s open to the public.” We were heading into Tenerife silly buggers territory.
He shrugged his shoulders, clearly confused. Luckily someone from the set was passing by; the guard asked him the same question.
“It doesn’t matter,” the set worker really couldn’t have cared less. “Everyone can see the set from the road anyway.”

I left the guard who was suddenly unsure of his remit and followed the three Spanish tourists. On one side of me Grecian pillars were strewn about the volcanic landscape and on the other, the semi circle of gods loomed closer. This was the main part of this particular Clash of the Titans set and where, in a couple of week’s time, Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes would be deciding Persius’ fate.

The almost finished main set

The almost finished main set

They’ve done a wonderful job on the set; the colours match the surrounding scenery perfectly. The various ancient Greek props strewn about look as they belong; like part of an abandoned archaeological dig. All that was missing were heroic warriors, the odd god and a mythical monster or two to complete the scene.

I took some more photos until I was told to not take any photos by another guard who’d been distracted by the three Spanish tourists – clearly multi-tasking wasn’t his forte, but I was done by then anyway.

I’m not sure what the purpose of stopping people taking pictures is. The set is clearly visible from the road, so it’s not as though it’s a secret or anything and the people who were actually working on the set weren’t bothered about it; a couple spoke to me quite openly about what was going on. Sometimes on Tenerife there can be a strange attitude to publicity as though it’s something to be feared which can be a tad counter productive when tourism is the bread, butter, lunch and evening meal of your economy.

It’s my view that publishing photos of the set will help raise the interest and the excitement factor that should come with a major movie like Clash of the Titans being made on Tenerife and that can’t be a bad thing for the promotion of the island.

So I hope you appreciate me risking life and limb (or at least being told off by a few security guards) to bring you these shots.

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To avoid the hell that is watching badly dubbed films we occasionally swap DVDs with friends, which is a bit like receiving Christmas presents in as much as we don’t always know what we’re going to end up with (sad I know, but Spanish TV does make you very appreciative).

Sometimes the movies are enjoyable, sometimes not, but a recent swap landed us with quite the most inane and possibly the least funny movie I’ve had the misfortune of ever seeing: ‘Dude, Where’s My Car’.
I’d deliberately managed to avoid it when it came out a few years ago, but in a desert of appallingly dubbed films, beggars can’t be choosers. So I watched it with an open mind. Quite clearly that should have been an empty mind.

Okay, if you’re a couple of thirteen year old boys who’ve had a couple of shandy’s and are puffing on an joint made from oregano then it might raise a smirk, but surely not for anyone else?
When I gave my friend some constructive feedback, i.e. I told her that I thought it was a load of old bollocks, she got quite shirty and suggested that maybe I didn’t get it because I wasn’t stoned. Okay…that’s one point of view, but:

  • I got ‘The Last King of Scotland’, but I’m not an insane baby eating dictator.
  • I got ‘Brokeback Mountain’, but I’m not a gay cowboy in denial.
  • I got ‘Sideways’, but I’m not a wine guzzling failed writer (on the other hand).

The reason I didn’t get ‘Dude, Where’s My Car’ wasn’t because I wasn’t stoned; I didn’t get it because it was garbage.

I’ve got a theory that ‘Dude, Where’s My Car’ was actually financed by the anti- cannabis league. If being stoned makes that film funny, then that’s got to be one of the strongest arguments against smoking dope that there is going.